Knuckleheads of the world, unite!

Above: Blue Ridge Christian Academy.

My grandfather, the Christian Scientist, frequently used that expression when confronted with anti-science dolts. I immediately knew it had to be the title of this piece.

I can do no better than to simply quote my local newspaper, the Greenville News, about this latest horror.

And to the rest of Blogdonia, Tumblr, all points of the internet and beyond, let me underscore it: SEE WHAT WE PUT UP WITH AROUND HERE? This is why I often do not take your intramural lefty-theoretical squabbles seriously. In these parts, we are still dealing with the freaking Scopes trial.

The title of the Greenville News account is Blue Ridge quiz ignites firestorm, accompanied by the coy subtitle, Furor brings attention, but possibly salvation. This is a cute example of how the Greenville News always tries to have it both ways. As is evident in the article below, this phrase could refer to 'salvation of the school itself'--which was ready to go belly-up financially... OR it could mean, literally, the way to Salvation with a capital S. (article is credited to Lyn Riddle, staff writer)

Which meaning is intended? You decide:

It was labeled “4th grade science quiz. Dinosaurs: Genesis and the Gospel.”

Eighteen questions. The first four were true or false.

The earth is billions of years old. A lopsided pencil mark circled false.

Dinosaurs lived millions of years ago, another circle: false.

It went on from there, testing students on the beginning of the world according to creationism, the belief that the literal interpretation of the first book of the Bible explains it all. Both were marked correct.

Before long, the quiz was posted on the social news website Reddit, unleashing a firestorm of criticism on Blue Ridge Christian Academy, a tiny private Christian school in northern Greenville County.

In what board chair Joy Hartsell says shows God is at work in the world, the controversy may be what saves the school from closing.

About six weeks ago, parents were told that the school would close May 31 because the founder and major donor would no longer make up the loss in operating expenses, said Diana Baker, the director.

“We may have found the path to get the money,” Hartsell said Friday.

So far, about $10,000 toward the $200,000 needed to stay open next fall has been received and more checks arrive in the mail every day, Baker said.

She said she received a $3,000 check on Thursday.

Cue my grandfather's phrase, the title of this blog post.

Fundies to the rescue! Knuckleheads of the world, unite!

The rest of the article makes it clear that the sheltered and ignorant denizens of Blue Ridge Christian Academy have never even seen Reddit before. Someone obviously unleashed the "DIAF" meme, which made them hyperventilate and call the sheriff's office. Do you believe? If I had called the sheriff every time someone online wished a nasty death on me... well, the Greenville County sheriff would be permanently camped out in my kitchen.

But yes, pick a fight with stupidity and then howl when the world takes you seriously, as I have said numerous times, is the usual fundamentalist technique.

Your thoughts?

Bob Jones University's MACBETH witches wear dreadlocks

Above, the three witches of MACBETH, sporting dreadlocks.

Today on Occupy the Microphone, we discussed Bob Jones University's newest production of MACBETH, which got a gushing (and what other kind is there?) endorsement from Sunday's worshipful GREENVILLE NEWS. As I have complained before (about a half-million times), the GREENVILLE NEWS has never ever criticized Bob Jones University, even when they appoint professional rape-apologists to their board, or suspend students for watching GLEE. As I have also said, they don't even print Letters to the Editors critical of BJU; segregation, racism, sexism, homophobia, students not being able to face their accusers, long-time faculty railroaded out of jobs because they state on internet forums that they don't like corporal punishment, etc... it's all peachy keen and wholesome as the dickens.

My all-time favorite GREENVILLE NEWS editorial (re: the aforementioned BJU scandal about the rape-excuser on the board) actually stated, "Whatever account is most accurate" (!)--which completely sums up the hands-off approach always applied to Bob Jones University, in which the words "investigative journalism" have absolutely no meaning.

What makes no sense is how the GREENVILLE NEWS obviously wants the big movers and shakers to relocate here; they want the international money-men to colonize Greenville even more than they have already. Do they understand that championing such an awful, embarrassing, oppressive institution is NOT the way to do this? Why not cut to the chase and simply print a banner headline advertising: GREENVILLE UNRESERVEDLY LOVES FUNDAMENTALIST WACKOS? I mean, if you are going to continue to rave about the wonderfulness of BJU without alluding to its repressive history (as well as its repressive present), that IS how it reads.

To name only the most recent example, the goofy, incorrect, thoroughly unscientific craziness in Bob Jones University's homeschool textbooks recently made the media rounds, singled out as an example of redneck stupidity and an occasion of extended hilarity on all the major networks. This craziness included rehabbing the kkk, who really were just misunderstood doncha know:

“[The Ku Klux] Klan in some areas of the country tried to be a means of reform, fighting the decline in morality and using the symbol of the cross. Klan targets were bootleggers, wife-beaters, and immoral movies. In some communities it achieved a certain respectability as it worked with politicians.”—United States History for Christian Schools, 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2001

And making sure students understand that slavery wasn't all bad:

“A few slave holders were undeniably cruel. Examples of slaves beaten to death were not common, neither were they unknown. The majority of slave holders treated their slaves well.”—United States History for Christian Schools, 2nd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 1991

And you probably didn't know that dinosaurs and humans lived side by side?:

“Bible-believing Christians cannot accept any evolutionary interpretation. Dinosaurs and humans were definitely on the earth at the same time and may have even lived side by side within the past few thousand years.”—Life Science, 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2007

In addition, fire-breathing dragons might be real, just like on GAME OF THRONES!:

“[Is] it possible that a fire-breathing animal really existed? Today some scientists are saying yes. They have found large chambers in certain dinosaur skulls…The large skull chambers could have contained special chemical-producing glands. When the animal forced the chemicals out of its mouth or nose, these substances may have combined and produced fire and smoke.”—Life Science, 3rd ed., Bob Jones University Press, 2007

And yes, unfortunately, I could go on. Further, Bob Jones University is one of the major suppliers of homeschooling textbooks worldwide ... and they make a lot of their money from this crackpot stuff.

But don't expect any criticism of this goofiness from our local newspaper of record. Not. One. Peep.

Maybe that's the worst part of it: The GREENVILLE NEWS is still pretending the place is a real school, instead of a fundamentalist cult. And this has the overall effect of making us all look like yahoos, every time we pick up their newspaper.

~*~

And so, the MACBETH production, like everything else at BJU, was deemed an unqualified success in the Sunday GREENVILLE NEWS account. But when I saw the photos of the three actresses playing the famous three witches in MACBETH, I was somewhat alarmed (but never surprised, considering who we are talking about) that their hair is all in dreadlocks.

What? (double-take)

Dreadlocks. DREAD. LOCKS.

Keep in mind that witches, to BJU, are real enough that they do not even allow their students to read the Harry Potter novels. Witches are unambiguously regarded as evil, satanic, bad. Thus, we must wonder why they consider dreadlocks specifically something that witches would wear? Why would they think that? I doubt anyone in Scotland in 1057 AD wore dreadlocks, know what I mean? But here in Greenville in 2013, who DOES wear them?

Think about that.

African Americans and white hippie pagan weirdos. You know, the evil people. In fact, it is African drumming that makes rock music uniquely evil and satanic, in case you didn't know. Things from AFRICA are automatically suspect in BJU-circles. (Interracial dating was prohibited on campus until 2000.)

And so, we have to ask, what do the dreadlocks on witches mean in this context? Was this an openly-racist decision by the wardrobe department, or as Sheila Jackson, my caller on today's radio show, said, is this "subliminal"? Are they aware of the implications of singling out a hairstyle associated with African-Americans and Afrocentric religion (the Rastafarians) and assigning this iconic hairstyle to the most famous trio of spell-casting witches in literary history?

Either way, it stinks... and it illustrates how backward and embarrassing they are, besides.

I am reminded of the many 70s productions of "Jesus Christ Superstar" that cast King Herod as a flaming gay man surrounded by an interracial group of gender-benders. Um, what was THAT supposed to mean? (And I think we can easily see that now, can't we?)

The difference, of course, would be that these productions of "Jesus Christ Superstar" are from about four decades ago... and BJU's dreadlocked MACBETH witches are from RIGHT NOW.

Yes, four decades behind. That's about right.

Lunar Eclipse last night makes us act weirdly today

Left: photo by NASA


There was a scantily-reported lunar eclipse last night, which the moon-watchers already wrote off as no big thing. Ha! Of course it is. Twitter is already down, for example. That'll teach people to underestimate the moon!

Oddly, I noticed the lunar event on my Hindu calendar; it wasn't noted on any of my "Western" calendars...

The penumbral eclipse occurred at 13 degrees of Aquarius at 8:55pm EDT. From A Pakistan News:

This is a unique lunar eclipse in that it’s the third lunar eclipse of the season, and second this summer.

For horoscope and astrology lovers, this rare occurrence will bring out the Aquarian influences in your life.

This full moon lunar eclipse brings the sun’s rays shining in its home sign of Leo ruling matters of creativity, children, playfulness, leisurely activities, and love affairs; while the Moon will occupy Aquarius, the sign known for its futuristic take on life, humanity, science, knowledge, and social groups.

While it’s possible that no major event may occur during this special time, your sensitivities are heightened as some lingering events may come to a close…quite unexpectedly.

The Twitter junkies are already flooding Facebook and will probably bring it down too. I admit, I hate being without my regular tweets from Turner Classic Movies and the New York Times, as well as my extremely cool droogs. Phooey...

But it is obvious to me, Twitter was all messed up by the moon. Yes, you cynical atheists and rationalists can sneer at me, but I KNOW what's up.

~*~

I am currently attempting a low-level detox, using THIS product (there's the commercial, Dr Lindsey!) and some very basic alfalfa, peppermint and dandelion-root tea. (Yes, the bathroom is my friend!) I am hoping to refocus my diet and get back to my former benchmark of 50% raw foods, which always makes me feel physically fantastic. I'd like to go higher (75% raw is my goal), but I never quite manage it. I end up lapsing and eating cheese tortellinis and potato samosas in extremis. Humans are not meant to forage indefinitely, or else we would be orangutans. Right?

When I do manage to transition to predominantly raw foods, I feel like the not-humans at the Dawn of Time in 2001: A Space Odyssey, gibbering and squabbling over the watering-hole: Gimme.

I feel "hungry" -- even when I'm technically not hungry. Perhaps (wo)man was not meant to live by weeds alone?

It's embarrassing to admit it, but the least little cooked thing grabs my attention and suddenly looks scrumptious, even boring combinations of lima beans and kale. Are we MEANT to eat cooked food? (And WHERE are the radical atheist evolutionists when I need to ask them a dietary question?)

I think the problem is--the standard American starchy diet leaves us filling "full" most of the time. This is not a normal state of affairs. When we start eating foods that are quickly digested, it feels strange, like hunger. But the stomach is MEANT to be empty sometimes; it's just that Americans have forgotten how to live that way.

One raw food that readily quells fake-hunger, almost-hunger and real hunger: nuts. (Are we supposed to be living on nuts and berries after all?) Also, chia seeds and pepitas. I love them all, of course (with the exception of meat, I haven't met any foods I truly dislike), but I do feel a bit like an orangutan or one of Stanley Kubrick's early not-humans: Get away from my cashews, now! (I foraged for them, go find your own!)

By contrast, when I go back to eating trash? I am very generous, here, have some Cheetos! Nah, go on, take the whole bag! (((preens at my own generosity)))

I figure this is some sort of evolutionary adaptation, since we have Cheetos in abundance.

Odds and Sods - SAD edition

Yes, folks, SEASONAL AFFECTIVE DISORDER (SAD) is real, although it's so common that I don't know if it should even be called a DISORDER. As I peruse the blogs, I see that several people have the winter-blahs, and it's a quite common refrain.

To me, SAD is just another vestige of our primitive past; another useful evolutionary adaptation that we no longer need. Just like that deadly love of fats and carbohydrates... which incidentally, also shoots up like a rocket during the winter. Without these adaptations, we'd all be dead--and don't you forget it... as you gnaw away on chocolate-chip cookies, blaming your munchies on football.

If we hadn't turned soporific and holed up deep inside the cave to sleep away the winter, well, we'd have frozen our Northern-European asses off. And so now, we just want to... well...yawn...(Insert Cowardly Lion voice, as he galloped through the poppy fields with Dorothy: "Come to think of it, forty winks wouldn't be bad!")

Some future day, they'll have this brain chemistry thing all figured out and they'll give us all a shot on New Year's Day, particularly if we have too many of the telltale Northern European genes: "These people are a MESS--they really need to be hibernating!" And poof!--the SAD will all go away. In the meantime, if you don't want to engage Big Pharm, I can recommend the herb Rhodiola, which our ancestors called Golden Root and the Swedes wisely stockpiled for such purposes. I would also add Ashwanghanda and Ginseng, which I (honestly) never leave home without.

And I don't promise these herbs can completely overcome a million years of evolution, either, as BigPharm promises...but you might at least come out of the cave for a few hours, and maybe even function on a fair-to-middling level.

Meanwhile, been checking out the blogs today...


Photo from Movie Crunch.


G of Doves Today writes very well about working at an elite award event in Southern Cal:

"Okay," said my friend, "it's getting close to showtime. Let's check the lobby." And we turned to go out the side door.

Only there was a group of people coming through the door. We stepped back so they could pass us. Oh. It was Them.

Yes, you know who They are!

She's really tiny. He's tall. Her skin is flawless. He's....I'm speechless.

I could never do such work for a living, because I might well involuntarily scream like some silly teenybopper... or as one person commented, giggle insanely.

~*~

mirabile dictu quotes Naomi Klein at The Nation:

Every day that Israel pounds Gaza brings more converts to the BDS cause, and talk of cease-fires is doing little to slow the momentum. Support is even emerging among Israeli Jews. In the midst of the assault roughly 500 Israelis, dozens of them well-known artists and scholars, sent a letter to foreign ambassadors stationed in Israel. It calls for “the adoption of immediate restrictive measures and sanctions” and draws a clear parallel with the antiapartheid struggle. “The boycott on South Africa was effective, but Israel is handled with kid gloves.… This international backing must stop.”

Yet even in the face of these clear calls, many of us still can’t go there. The reasons are complex, emotional and understandable. And they simply aren’t good enough.

~*~

An environmentalist was on TV talking about how he didn't throw anything away FOR A YEAR.

He said what?! I musta heard that wrong.

No, I heard him right. A whole year. And then there was a video report, showing... oh holy God, WORMS in his basement. WORMS. He said they kept it extremely clean, gobbling up all the organic waste matter, like uneaten food. (((screams)))

How did he sleep, knowing there were worms down there?

Here is Sustainable Dave's blog about his year-long experiment, suitably named 365 Days of Trash.

If we require worms close by, I don't know if I can be a good environmentalist. (shame)

~*~

The fabulous and always-honest Sage at Persephone's Box, writes about one of my favorite subjects, friendship... notably the differences between male and female friendships:

What about women as friends? While the guys are falling in love with me or trying to seduce me, the women are protecting their turf against me. Tanya won't do anything without her husband there, and then they just talk together the entire night. Alice got upset when I spoke directly to her boyfriend the day after I had given birth. I was working on sitting comfortably, and she was accusing me of trying to steal her fella. Then there's Jane. I share an office with Paul, Joe and Jane, and I've been hanging out alone in my classroom lately.

Jane and I have been sort-of friends for a decade or so. We work together and sometimes drink together with the guys there, but we never get into really heavy conversations. I never seem to with women I meet in real life, unfortunately. She had a long affair with another teacher who just retired. In the months before he was leaving, she changed dramatically. If I so much as exchanged pleasantries with him, she'd jump up and actually stand between us. I let it go because it was obviously a difficult time for her.

One of the good things about aging is that these things happen to me less and less often, if ever. (And you know, I can truthfully say I don't miss this sorta stuff at all. It is so nice to have women friends who don't assume you are after their husbands.)

Why are women often so jealous of other women? Is this the fault of the pat... uhhhh, the kyriarchy, or is this in ourselves and our own fears of not measuring up? Both? It continues to puzzle me, and as I age and step away from such interpersonal feuds, I find it is now safe to examine these conflicts closer. And I come back to the same conclusion, always: we can not have success in our feminist endeavors, until we STOP.

And speaking of feminism, the best for last:

I often cover the nasty ideological wars in feminist Blogdonia, but I rarely mention it when people discover common ground and rise above their differences. Thus, it gives me enormous pleasure to note that yes, IT DOES HAPPEN! Check out these inspiring posts by Renegade Evolution and Ginmar, who have decided that they can agree to disagree, WITH RESPECT! Because they know they are coming from the same place, deep concern for women. As Ginmar writes:

[Renegade Evolution] was appalled at the way prostitutes, dancers, and other workers were treated, as if all they were were sexual things to be used. In story after story, I noticed that prostitutes were referred to as prostitutes, by the number of times they'd been arrested. I wanted to know where they grew up, what books they liked, what they wanted to be in high school, who they were. The answer the newspapers and judges and others gave was this: she was a prostitute, so it didn't matter. Some of them were desperate women. Some chose the life. Some were trafficked into it. There were so many problems that they had to be distilled to orders of importance, and at the top of the heap was the important one: what is best for women? What do they want? Not deciding for them, but asking them.

There's no perfection in people, and thank God, because nobody I know would meet the standard. We'd all be without friends and have nothing but enemies and judges. But I now have fewer enemies and it feels good. I feel my energy refocused on what's important, what bedevils us all, and clarity feels so good.

Ren Ev and I will disagree. But once you start talking to someone, it's amazing what you can agree on.

Awesomeness! (((Daisy cries copious hippie-peacenik tears!)))

What is great about these posts (AND YOU MUST READ THEM ALL!) is how they show us that we can learn from disagreements... they aren't always "bad"...what is usually "bad" is how we react to disagreement, not the disagreement itself.

~*~

Wow, all that reading just wore my ass out... time to go back in the cave, turn on LAW AND ORDER and chew on some (organic, of course) chocolate-chip cookies...

Thank God for Evolution

...is the title of a book by "evolutionary evangelist" Michael Dowd, whom I have just read about in Mountain Xpress. Dowd was a born-again Christian when he met Connie Barlow, an atheist scientist. (What do you get when you cross...?) And now, the two of them have taken their act on the road:

The couple are now full-time “evolutionary evangelists” who live on the road—in a van emblazoned with a Jesus fish and Darwin fish in a lip-lock—preaching the good word. “Our goal is to inspire people of all ages and theological orientations to embrace the history of everyone and everything in personally and socially transforming ways,” Dowd writes.

His enthusiasm for the subject is obvious from page one; his excitement contagious. Chapters cover many facets of science ("Thank God for the Hubble Telescope!,” “Lessons from Evolutionary Brain Science” and “Furry Li’l Mammal to the Rescue") and religion ("Experiencing God versus Thinking About God,” “God or the Universe: What’s in a Name?” and “Genesis in Context") but the book really comes into its own in later chapter where Dowd explores the place of evolution in expanding spirituality. There’s more than a hint of Zen philosophy and nods to psychology. Yet, even as the author continues to expend his scope via the discussion of evolution, he continues to return to religious—mainly Biblical—ideology. For readers who are either uninterested in or uncomfortable with Christian doctrine, this may be a deal breaker (just as many ideas that Dowd posits in regard to evolution may be deal breakers for fundamentalists). The author does traverse this mine field with impressive delicacy, however. “For me today, the interpretation of the Gospel that lives most vibrantly is this: “Jesus as God’s way, truth and life” means that to the extent that I live in evolutionary integrity, as Jesus lived, I am living God’s way, manifesting God’s truth and bringing God’s vitality and life-enhancing service into the world,” he writes.

Over on the web site, there are some fascinating FAQs:

Why are you so enthusiastic, even evangelistic, about evolution?

I see sacred views of evolution as the Good News (the ‘gospel’) of our time, personally and collectively. I thank God for the entire 14-billion-year epic of cosmic, biological, and human emergence, because an inspiring interpretation of the history of everything and everyone builds bridges, provides guidance, and restores realistic hope for individuals and families, for humanity, and for the body of life as a whole.

How do you see evolution ‘building bridges, providing guidance, and restoring realistic hope’?

When I say that a meaningful view of evolution “builds bridges,” I mean that it reconciles head and heart, reason and faith. It also harmonizes a variety of religious perspectives—and these with nonreligious points of view, as well. More, it helps people not just tolerate differences, but actually value the diversity. I have found that individuals whose families suffer from internal religious discord are especially grateful to take on a sacred view of evolution—precisely because this perspective really can build bridges.

When I suggest that an inspiring evolutionary worldview “provides guidance,” I mean two things. First, a sacred view of evolution offers a more grounded and widely acceptable basis for ethics and moral instruction than ancient texts could ever hope to offer. This is a crucial realization. Second, a ‘holy view of deep-time’ shows how our way into the future is clear and unambiguous. Or to use religious language, it reveals how ‘God’s will’ is obvious and universal.

Finally, once we grasp that a meaningful view of cosmic history actually can build bridges and does provide important guidance, a third reason for thanking God for evolution becomes apparent: it “restores hope.” A sacred view of evolution restores realistic hope because—whatever our different beliefs about an afterlife or possible supernatural intervention—we can see how our way forward in this world becomes clear—and realistically possible.

Can you say more about how you see evolution restoring hope?

Religious zealotry that slides into violent action now threatens a whole new threshold of danger for the simple reason that exceedingly destructive weapons are now small enough to conceal and within the realm of possibility for motivated individuals and groups to obtain. For this reason, anything that bridges faith and reason and helps reconcile opposing religious viewpoints surely restores hope. Moreover, in chaotic and uncertain times, like now, when things seem to be getting better and better, and worse and worse, faster and faster, anything that provides practical guidance for moving into a just and thriving future, personally and collectively, restores hope too.

On a more personal level, a sacred evolutionary worldview restores hope because it offers a deeper, truer understanding of human nature than non-evolutionary approaches possibly can. It’s no longer a mystery why we (and our loved ones) are tempted by the things that we’re tempted by, why we struggle with the things we do, and why staying in integrity for any length of time typically requires growing in humility, authenticity, responsibility, and serving a larger purpose, with the support of others. Understanding the religious implications of evolutionary brain science and evolutionary psychology is truly empowering. Evolutionary spirituality, which is informed by these disciplines, offers lasting freedom from troublesome habits and addictive thoughts and behaviors. And it does so not by rejecting earlier ways of speaking about ‘our inherited proclivities,’ or ‘our unchosen nature,’ (such as ‘original sin’) but by validating such traditional language and reinterpreting ancient insights in light of what has been, and is still being, revealed through the empirical sciences.

Okay, I admit it, I like this guy.

----------------
Listening to: Uncle Tupelo - Looking for a Way Out
via FoxyTunes

Who are you to wave your finger, you musta been out your head...

Left: Provided by the witty atheists at About.com


From Head-On radio and the New Orleans Times-Picayune comes this interesting story:

Vitter earmarked federal money for creationist group

Posted by Bill Walsh, Washington bureau
September 22, 2007 9:10PM

WASHINGTON -- Sen. David Vitter, R-La., earmarked $100,000 in a spending bill for a Louisiana Christian group that has challenged the teaching of Darwinian evolution in the public school system and to which he has political ties.

The money is included in the labor, health and education financing bill for fiscal 2008 and specifies payment to the Louisiana Family Forum "to develop a plan to promote better science education."

The earmark appears to be the latest salvo in a decades-long battle over science education in Louisiana, in which some Christian groups have opposed the teaching of evolution and, more recently, have pushed to have it prominently labeled as a theory with other alternatives presented. Educators and others have decried the movement as a backdoor effort to inject religious teachings into the classroom.

The nonprofit Louisiana Family Forum, launched in Baton Rouge in 1999 by former state Rep. Tony Perkins, has in recent years taken the lead in promoting "origins science," which includes the possibility of divine intervention in the creation of the universe.

The group's stated mission is to "persuasively present biblical principles in the centers of influence on issues affecting the family through research, communication and networking." Until recently, its Web site contained a "battle plan to combat evolution," which called the theory a "dangerous" concept that "has no place in the classroom." The document was removed after a reporter's inquiry.

But hey, sports fans, here is the really good part:

The group's tax-exempt status prohibits the Louisiana Family Forum from political activity, but Vitter has close ties to the group. Dan Richey, the group's grass-roots coordinator, was paid $17,250 as a consultant in Vitter's 2004 Senate race. Records also show that Vitter's campaign employed Beryl Amedee, the education resource council chairwoman for the Louisiana Family Forum.

The group has been an advocate for the senator, who was elected as a strong supporter of conservative social issues. When Vitter's use of a Washington, D.C., call-girl service drew comparisons last month to the arrest of Sen. Larry Craig, R-Idaho, in what an undercover officer said was a solicitation for sex in an airport men's room, Family Forum Executive Director Gene Mills came to Vitter's defense.

Do these guys have some fucking temerity or what? Where do these hypocritical Republicans COME FROM?????

In a video clip the group posted on the Internet site YouTube, Mills said the two senators' situations are far different. "Craig is denying the allegations," he said. "Vitter has repented of the allegations. He sought forgiveness, reconciliation and counseling."

Vitter's office said it is not surprising that people he employed would also do work for Louisiana Family Forum, which shares his philosophical outlook. He said the education earmark was meant to offer a broad array of views in the public schools.

"This program helps supplement and support educators and school systems that would like to offer all of the explanations in the study of controversial science topics such as global warming and the life sciences," Vitter said in a written statement.

The money in the earmark will pay for a report suggesting "improvements" in science education in Louisiana, the development and distribution of educational materials and an evaluation of the effectiveness of the Ouachita Parish School Board's 2006 policy that opened the door to biblically inspired teachings in science classes.

"I believe it is an important program," Vitter said.

Critics said taxpayer money should not go to support a religion-based program.

"This is a misappropriation of public funds," said Charles Kincade, a civil rights lawyer in Monroe who has been involved in church-state cases. "It's a backdoor attempt to push a religious agenda in the public school system."

And you knew Santorum would show up in this story somewhere, dincha?

Former Sen. Rick Santorum, R-Pa., a Christian conservative defeated for re-election in 2004, attempted to open the door for such money when he inserted language into a report accompanying the 2001 No Child Left Behind Act enabling teachers to offer "the full range of scientific views" when "topics that may generate controversy (such as biological evolution)" are taught.

In 1987, the U.S. Supreme Court threw out a Louisiana law that would have required schools to teach creationist theories, which hold that God created the universe, whenever evolution was taught. In 2002, the Louisiana Family Forum unsuccessfully sought to persuade the state Board of Elementary and Secondary Education to insert a five-paragraph disclaimer in all of its science texts challenging the natural science view that life came about by accident and has evolved through the process of natural selection.

The group notched a victory last year when the Ouachita School Board adopted a policy that, without mentioning the Bible or creationism, gave teachers leeway to introduce other views besides those contained in traditional science texts.

"Many of our educators feel inadequate to address the controversies," said Mills, executive director of the Louisiana Family Forum.

Mills said that his group didn't request the money in the 2008 appropriations bill, and that Vitter's proposal "was a bit of a surprise."

Mills said his group is not attempting to push the teaching of evolution out of the schools, but wants to supplement it. Yet, some of the material posted on the Louisiana Family Forum's Web site suggests a more radical view.

It just gets better, their "fact-sheet" was penned by another convict-hypocrite:

Among other things, a "Louisiana Family Forum Fact Sheet" at one point included "A Battle Plan -- Practical Steps to Combat Evolution" by Kent Hovind, a controversial evangelist who is serving a 10-year prison sentence for tax offenses and obstruction of justice.

Hovind's paper stated, "Evolution is not a harmless theory but a dangerous religious belief" that underpinned the atrocities committed by Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin and Pol Pot of the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia.

The group's "Evolution Addendum for Public Schools," also posted on the Web site, offers a flavor of its concerns. The document rejects the evolutionary connection between apes and humans, questions the standard explanation of fossil formation and seeks to undercut the prevailing scientific view that life emerged from a series of chemical reactions.

"Under ideal conditions, the odds of that many amino acids coming together in the right order are approximately the same as winning the Power Ball Lotto every week for the next 640 years," it states. "How could this have happened accidentally?"

I think it would be optimal (academically, as well as a way to increase awareness and tolerance) to teach all the major creation stories: Adam and Eve, Nataraj dancing the universe into creation (my personal favorite), Spider-Woman weaving the earth into existence (second favorite), and so on. But these stories are not science. They are culture and myth; religion and belief. Those should be courses in public schools. The reason they currently can't be is because religious fanatics keep them out; they don't want ALL religions taught equally, they only want theirs taught. Rather than compromise with other faiths to get their particular version out there, the fanatics totally close down and won't let the Muslim and Jainist and other creation-accounts into public school, either.

Also, of course, they think this IS science.

Kincade, the Monroe lawyer, said Vitter's and Louisiana Family Forum's motives are not benign.

"What you have to do is look below the surface," said Kincade, who holds an undergraduate degree in physics and has been active in legal cases in which religious groups challenge science instruction. "It frames the issue in a way that appeals to America's sense of fair play. The problem is, except for fringe people, evolution is an accepted fact of science. It is not a hotly contested issue. The general concept of natural selection and evolution is settled and beyond dispute. To suggest otherwise is misleading. They are trying to backdoor creationism."

Vitter's appropriation was contained in a database compiled by Taxpayers for Common Sense, a nonprofit group seeking to reduce the number of earmarks in federal legislation. Earlier this year, Congress agreed for the first time to begin linking specially requested earmarks to the names of their sponsors. Taxpayers for Common Sense has compiled thousands of them into searchable databases.

Vitter said the financing request was submitted earlier this year and "was evaluated on its merit." But Steve Ellis, of the taxpayers' group, said most earmarks are not vetted by anyone except the member requesting it.

"Using an earmark to dictate that the Louisiana Family Forum receive the funding to develop a science education program ironically ignores a hallmark of scientific research, making decisions on the basis of competitive, empirical research," Ellis said.

The appropriations bill is awaiting Senate action.

As my late mother would have said: Hoo boy!