Saturday, August 21, 2010

Kombucha withdrawal

For godsake, will somebody tell me what is going on with the KOMBUCHA?!? Are they trying to KILL US or WHAT?!

You non-Kombucha-drinkers are probably wondering what I am fussing about. Well, the #1 maker of commercial Kombucha in the USA, Synergy, is AWOL. Not exactly a recall, but no other shipments are currently forthcoming. The shelves in every city are empty, and I know someone who actually drove to Charlotte to get some. (Yes, she was kind enough to share!) The Kombucha junkies of America are jonesing; we are all suffering from major Theanine withdrawal. (Most of us drank it every day.)

Apparently, the actual fermentation in Synergy could be out of sync with the trace amounts of alcohol promised on the label (this explains plenty!)... I guess some people were complaining, or maybe somebody somewhere actually got drunk on it? (I found the amount comparable to mouthwash, with very little variation.)

And now, as a result, there is NO Synergy! :(

Pathetic Kombucha junkies prowl the streets, ransacking every possibly-healthy store in the land, settling for cheaper impersonations and attempting to make their own (which I am told is fairly easy to do, if you have adequate space, which I don't). It's a sorry state of affairs. Simply put, all Kombucha is not the same, and Synergy is the best there is.

Synergy-guru GT Dave has posted this on the company website:


In order to improve product quality, label integrity and to comply with the highest standards, we at GT's Synergy Kombucha have temporarily removed our products from store shelves. Excellence is our motto, and we remain committed to bringing you the freshest, purest, and most potent Kombucha available. We miss you already. Watch for us to return SOON. For more updates, please visit us on Facebook.

-GT Dave
(((screams))) We are dying out here, Dave! Please hurry and tweak the formula, or whatever it is you've been doing for the past month.

The Facebook page doesn't have much more to say, except that they are promising a deadline of LATE AUGUST.

Um, this IS late August, and I want my Kombucha, Dave!

Kombucha-brethren, stay strong! We will prevail!


Other random stuff:

:: I used up all my vacation time going to Texas, so I didn't go to Medicines from the Earth, the yearly herbalist conference I wrote about a couple of years ago. Ditto, the Southeast Women's Herbal Conference, but linking here in case anyone else wants to sign up!

:: If you can't find any Kombucha to sustain you, try to locate some 'Coconut Milk Beverage' by So Delicious. This isn't plain, raw coconut milk; it has been tinkered with to make it palatable... my new favorite thing!

:: Check out wonderful GREEN PATRIOT RADIO!

:: What is your city's "Sun-IQ"?

:: Who gets upset when people won't friend you? Who doesn't care? And who thinks Facebook is the Devil, besides my cousin?

If you wanna friend me on Facebook and make me look evermore popular, I'm ready! (PS: let me know you are from the blog!)

Hope everyone is having a great weekend!


D. said...

Kombucha? *scratches head*

I don't think Facebook is the devil. But there doesn't seem to be any conception of privacy; Facebook seems to be run by people who thought the telescreens in 1984 were a good thing. Not touching it. Sorry.

Lindsay Cotter said...

yes, I am in withdrawl. This is ridiculous. I hear the black market calling.

JoJo said...

I'm so sorry that you can't get your Kombucha. :( I can only assume they've probably pulled their product nationwide, not just where you live. So I doubt our natural food stores would have it, or I'd try to find some to ship to you! Hope it comes back soon!

Word verif: rucedifi Sounds like a Harry Potter spell. lol

Marion said...

I saw some Kombucha a while ago...guess it was before they pulled it. I had no idea.

But I'm going to try that coconut milk drink...that sounds good to me as I love coconut. But Facebook? not so much!

white rabbit said...

Daisy - You have no idea how totally you have lost me with the Kombucha thing...


wv: hells

Jim said...

Daisy, is kombu itself available where you are? It's somthing you cna probably mail order; how hard can it be to ship? I don't know what's involved in brewing your own kombucha. Lord knows people do it but I don't know how much fuss is involved.

I have a friend who swears by the stuff, but she doesn't drink it much anymore. There are other probiotic things to add to your diet. Kimchi is not the easiest thing to make - I haven't cracked the code yet - but you can use it in so much other food. Then there umeboshi that you can make out of all those useless hard little plums and that tastes great on corn on the cob.

Doc Anchovy said...

Make mine a "spoon stands up in it" coffee, cream and date sugar or blue agave sweetener.

DaisyDeadhead said...

A customer informed me yesterday that this whole situation is ALL LINDSAY LOHAN'S FAULT.

Goodness mercy. Who knew?