Wednesday, October 27, 2010

The rich get rich and the poor get children

I was awarded a strong cup of coffee about a year ago by lovely Jackie, who is no longer blogging. (We miss you!)

I am hereby using that snazzy graphic to announce: The new "low sugar" variety of Frappucino by Starbucks, simply is not the liquid crack we know, love and crave.

It's not BAD, you understand, it just doesn't serve the addictive personality!

As of yesterday morning, I'm back on the hard stuff.

And speaking of such matters... THIS NONSENSE especially got on my nerves today:

Before Facebook, infertile couples could try to avoid pregnant people at work or social gatherings, limiting their exposure to triggers of bitterness or jealousy. But that was when friendships were forged mainly in person, not via today's social media Web sites, where people can feel ambushed by photos of friends' - or mere acquaintances' - baby bumps.

Now, when more than a half-billion people use Facebook, couples yearning for children say they are trapped: They are unwilling to detach from the social network, but unable to avoid its frequent reminders - fetal sonograms are seemingly ubiquitous - of what might elude them forever.
Aside: Pregnant PEOPLE?! Are we now expected to refer to pregnant PEOPLE?

You know, you can choose NOT to use Facebook at ALL; I am married to a man who refuses to register for a variety of reasons. It CAN be done! ((gasp)) But no, they expect everyone to kowtow to their oversensitivity, rather than disengage from something that hurts them.

Now, whose fault is that?!

As an alcoholic who hasn't had a drink in (((counts on fingers))) 28 years, I suppose I should whine and bitch and moan about the omnipresent alcohol commercials and all the hard-partying I read about on the net? (Whiny voice: HOW DARE YOU PEOPLE PARTY WITHOUT ME!!??!! ) Seriously though, that used to trigger me all the time, and nobody really gave a shit. (Drunks have never been popular, except in literature, or for comic relief.) I had to learn to deal, and I suggest these rich people undergoing pricey fertility treatments, learn the same. GROW UP.

The Washington Post article admits as much:
There's no shortage of people who feel pain while scrolling through Facebook: Chronically single people may envy friends' wedding pictures, for instance, and those who've lost a spouse can feel overwhelmed by friends' wedding anniversary announcements.
And guess what else?!

POOR PEOPLE can be triggered by reading about expensive vacations, houses, cars, clothes and electronic goodies... and even (wait for it!) expensive fertility treatments they can't afford. Are these affluent couples going to stop talking about that stuff because poor and unemployed people are "triggered"?

Wait, this is Facebook we are talking about... they probably don't HAVE any friends like that.
Elisabeth Rivers, 39, who has been trying to have her first child for four years, was recently getting a pedicure in Arlington when she pulled out her cellphone and logged onto Facebook.
I've never had a pedicure. Should I whine and complain I can't afford a pedicure?

She is TRIGGERING ME about the pedicures, goddammit! Stop, stop!
As she scanned her news feed, she noticed that her cousin's profile photo had changed to a grainy image.

"The post said, 'Here's a picture of our little baby.' I felt like I got punched in the gut," said Rivers, of Alexandria, who has spent $80,000 on fertility treatments and leads a monthly support group for infertility patients. "You want to be happy for people, but you take it personally. I was like, 'Why the hell does [my cousin] have a sonogram for her profile picture?' I called my mother and she said, 'Oh, we were wondering how we were going to tell you.' You feel like people are pitying you and they are avoiding telling you things. When they do that, it makes it that much harder."
If you expect me to have sympathy for someone who can spend $80,000 on fertility treatments, think again.

And let's not even ask why the Washington Post is writing about these extremely well-to-do people instead of the people who can't afford computers to access Facebook in the first place. Are the poor TRIGGERED when the mass media incessantly bleats about Facebook and Twitter? (Do you care if they are?)

When the rich fart, we all have to smell the stench. If a poor person farts, they arrest them for stinking up the joint.

Yes, that's an original quote.

If kids were something only poor people had, they wouldn't want them anyway.

Another original quote.

~*~

Blog post title comes from the old song, "Ain't we got fun"--my grandmother used to sing it.

9 comments:

D. said...

Well, there was the pregnant trans man (and the rule for plurals in Spanish is that if there is one male, the collective noun is masculine. This cheesed me off as a teenager) last year.

I remember when newspapers did reporting and features were secondary.

JoJo said...

I admit I felt a bit guilty about my trip to Victoria last week, when one of my FB friends in Seattle has been dying to go but is broke, she and her boyfriend of 8 yrs just separated and she's undergoing cancer treatment. Last summer she and I had talked about going to Victoria together to meet up w/ our friend Moriah.

Instead, I booked the trip for myself this fall, and met Moriah for dinner. And now I feel really bad about posting the pictures b/c Char couldn't be there with us and lord knows she could have used the distraction.

Facebook can be a double edged sword.

southernfemalelawyer said...

Dude - I just about hurled when I read this: "You feel like people are pitying you and they are avoiding telling you things. When they do that, it makes it that much harder."

But, ummm, you just got done bitching about people telling you. So, maybe you don't just want people to not talk/post about being pregnant, you believe that they should respect your feelings by not getting pregnant at all?

Holy hot bullshit.

southcarolinaboy said...

That Facebook thing...you know, that is easy to solve. If someone is trying to have a baby and gets tired of seeing in the news feed pictures of other people's babies, just hide them from your feed! It's a very useful option Facebook provides; there are several friends who are hidden from my feed because they posted crap I did not care to see, but I didn't have the heart to delete them right out. Works like a charm...

"If you expect me to have sympathy for someone who can spend $80,000 on fertility treatments, think again."

For real...

Jim said...

"You want to be happy for people, but you take it personally. I was like, 'Why the hell does [my cousin] have a sonogram for her profile picture?' I called my mother and she said, 'Oh, we were wondering how we were going to tell you.' You feel like people are pitying you and they are avoiding telling you things. When they do that, it makes it that much harder."

God there is so much Princess and the Pea in this. This is the female equivalent of ripping her shirt off in public and flexing her muscles and roaring at the sky.

Could she be any more dainty and delicate and precious and sensitive?

Does the world really need any child a weakling like this might bear? Make room for all those kids whose immune systems developed in a tropical slum.

Amber Rhea said...

Does the world really need any child a weakling like this might bear?

The misogyny in this statement REALLY bothers me.

DaisyDeadhead said...

Amber, explain where you see misogyny? I agree with Jim, although I would probably phrase it differently.

Weakling isn't a word I use.. I am given to "spoiled brat" in the same contexts.

Shinade said...

Wow.....that was one strong cup of coffee.

I bow to all of the other experts weighing in on this particular topic and will just say hello.

I've missed you!!

Hugs,
Jackie:-)

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