Tuesday, May 3, 2011


This has been a week for the record books. Been down so long, looks like up to me. Born under a bad sign. Hellhound on my trail. Etc. When blues songs define your life, well, that pretty much says it all.

I saw some movies yesterday, and that helped. Yay, escapism!


Even if it is rather slow and ponderous, I highly recommend STONE, if you want a deeply spiritual character study, highlighting the immediate problems with Christianity. If you already know what the problems are, you'll get it. If you don't, this will put it in stark relief for you, but in a non-confrontational manner. I identified heavily with the protagonist, a convict played by Edward Norton.

Norton is a marvel, possibly the greatest actor of our era. He is psychoanalyzed, sorta kinda, by Robert DeNiro, the greatest actor of HIS era. Watching these two play off each other is the great strength of the movie. It becomes real, right before your eyes, and you totally forget you are watching two well-known movie stars.

I loved it, but certainly, the film is not for everybody. A rather tepid ending, when the dramatic tension between the two leads causes you to expect fireworks. Then you realize, there WERE fireworks, but they were all interior.

Check it out, for something different.


I also saw BLACK SWAN at last. Natalie Portman says she was inspired by Repulsion, and you can tell. Great inspiration, and the scene in which the nail-clippers jab her is right out of the original.

I was astounded by her thinness (realistic for ballerinas; I'm not criticizing) and hope she's gained some weight for her pregnancy.

Mr Daisy was disappointed by the ending. He wanted her to turn into a giant black swan and fly out into the audience and eat people.

You shouldn't let fan-boys watch this stuff.


If you pray, pray for me. Whatever you do, please do it. It is not pleasant to lose a parent and a job in one week. The first loss, however, has eclipsed the second one easily. I am pretty numb; I simply didn't know how to write about it until now.

But it's soooo quiet here. I can smell the honeysuckle outside, as the southern spring air drifts in from the woods. And I like not having to dash out the door for a change. (Translation: I think this might be one of those blessings in disguise, but right now, sure doesn't feel that way.)

I love you, my blogger buddies. If you have never commented here (or rarely comment anywhere), how about you leave one and let me know you're out there? It really would help.

More to come. Always.


Charles D said...

At times like these, hardly anyone knows what to say, but hopefully saying something is better than avoidance. Sounds like you're dealing with your losses in the proper order at least. I've been reading your blog regularly for the last few months and enjoying it very much.

Thanks for the movie hints. I don't really know enough about movies having grown up in a Southern Baptist home where we avoided pleasures of most every kind. Now I am often surprised by them. This week I sat through the entire American in Paris with Gene Kelly on TCM and loved it. Had never really seen the entire film before. I put Stone and Repulsion in my Netflix queue and am looking forward to watching them.

Kate Schulte said...

So sorry for your loss. It is so hard to deal with the loss of a parent. when I lost my mother, someone said it's like there's a hole on the horizon. For a time, I felt like I had lost my power shield. But time does help...

Da Bee's Knees said...

I'm so sorry to read of your losses. I read here regulary; am subbed to your blog.

I will pray for you to feel Him in the midst of this whirlpool, drawing you to still waters.

Here's a few things that I live by:

1. Real life isn't always pretty or perfect. But it is always a blessing.

2. Jeremiah 29:11... In context- it was after a long wait that freedom came. Just know that your Redeemer stands by. Just KNOWING that there is a plan helps me.

Hugs to you and never lose your hippiedom! You are a real person showing real emotions, living a real and imperfect life. In other words: transparent.

JRD said...

Daisy! We're very sorry to hear about your loses - neither is easy, but we're sure you'll make it through both.

We're not prayers, but we're certainly thinking of you!

- The Compoundians

mama moretti said...

we're here for you, d. just holler.

Ali said...

Hi Daisy. I've been following you on Google Reader for several months now but I have never commented. I always look forward to a new post from you. From what I've read of yours I have a lot of respect for you as a person and a writer. I don't pray, but I sincerely hope you find the strength to get through these difficulties.

I'm so sorry.

Jon said...

Daisy, I pray all the time and you are in my prayers.

Bryce said...

i'm also here for you. u know that. xoxoxoxo

kittywampus said...

Hugs to you, Daisy - and wishes for healing and comfort.


JoJo said...

I am so very sorry for your loss Daisy. ((hugs)) Hang in there.

John Powers said...

I'm thinking of you Daisy. Condolences.

About blessings in disguise, I don't know blessings are blessings and your capacity to recognize blessings, if with a bit of snark, will help your grieving.

Even when you hurt take joy. There is another side.

YogaforCynics said...

So sorry for your loss, Daisy.


D. said...

Sorry to hear of your loss; losing a parent is a hit to the psyche, especially if you were close.

Daisy said...

We are keeping you in our thoughts and purrs during this difficult time. {{hugs}}

Corey said...

Wow, Daisy. I'm so sorry for your losses- I can't really imagine getting used to the world without my parents...thinking about you in PA. Hope the love and purrs from my other favorite Daisy help. You're a gem.

Willow said...

I lit a candle to Teresa of Avila for you; I hope you don't think that's too superstitious or whatnot (patroness of those who lose a parent, prolific and talented writer, and generally badass woman...seemed appropriate)

Norton is a marvel, possibly the greatest actor of our era.

Right on!

DaisyDeadhead said...

D, well, we weren't close. For some reason, that's made it worse, as I ponder whether I should have tried to patch it up with him before he passed. (see sidebar, post titled "Daddy"--I think you read it when Michael Jackson passed and I linked it then.) Once people are gone, that's it. No more chances.

Willow, I love Teresa of Avila! Thank you so much!!!

Thank you everyone for your kindness. (((sobs)))

SnowdropExplodes said...

Willingly offering prayers for you, and condolences to you.

Blue Heron said...

Wishing you the strength to move forward. Best wishes.


LarryE said...

Yeah, I'm out here. I don't comment much, but yeah, I'm out here. Along with a bunch of others. You are not alone.

we weren't close

It happens. And often enough we regret it later. But let it go: At any given moment, each of us does what we think is best. We are wrong often enough that our regrets would fill our entire lives if we could not let go of them - and keeping them is useful only to the extent that they can help us avoid in the future making the same sorts of decisions we came to regret before.

So rather than serving as a source of guilt for you, this should serve as a cautionary tale for the rest of us: Treasure what you have and do not waste opportunities.


candles lit..prayers send..anything I can do?...please let me know.

chaos said...

Sorry for your losses. I will be keeping you in my thoughts.

thene said...

oh shit, tell me about it. My father died at the end of February, two days after my sister's wedding (which was the first time I'd seen or spoken to him in three years.) And it was so strange.

Something that was said to me by an older friend who lost her own father two years ago - someone can become a better parent to you after their death than they were when they were alive. You can still talk to them, still heal the relationship. The worst part, for me, is still not knowing if it would be worth it.

Much love to you.

John Powers said...

I read a blog post by Catherine Lupton a couple of weeks ago that seems relevant to your situation. thene's comment that even after death you can still heal the relationship reminded me of the post.

In particular this: "My experience so far with personal stories is that chasing the truth of stories is a scarlet herring, but that it matters deeply which stories you choose to believe, and what that belief then makes real."

Lupton says she trusts there's a new story for her life, she just isn't sure what it is yet. So she talks of being "between stories." Having that trust is pretty hard when you're still reeling from the blows. Trust is something that is proven through tests even when we don't consciously think of it that way. Anyhow if your trust in yourself is flagging, take note of the many who have developed trust in you, proven over time by your stories here. We're fans cheering you on.

SC Boy said...

Love you, Daisy.

senchi said...

i'm here and i love you too, d. check your FB messages.

Renegade Evolution said...

LOVE NORTON...LOVE LOVE LOVE (adds Stone to must see list)

Disliked Black Swan A LOT.

And I am soooo bad and condolences. But I am sorry to hear of your losses...that just sucks

AK said...

Hang in there...it's going to get really tough. Use these people, we're here for you.

Joan Kelly said...

ah Daisy, I'm so sorry. I've been out of it in my own stuff, didn't see this until just now.

Keeping you in my heart.


wriggles said...

Thinking about the pleasure you bring and sending you warm thoughts over the internet.

Hoping they can reach you.

tenacitus said...

Been reading you for six months. Though I don/t know you I am sorry about you loosing your mother and job. I hope that you are okay and wanted to let you know that may the pain of your mother/s death be something you can deal with. As to the job you will get another. I have been unemployed for nine months so I know what its like.